Mar 19, 2024
In this episode of She's Not Done Yet: Conversations with women over 50, I (Becky Berry) talk with my friend Amy Refeca.
Amy and I met in 2019 while networking. Amy is the owner and managing attorney of Atlanta Wills and Trusts Law Group in Alpharetta, Georgia. Her firm helps women protect who and what they love the most.
We talk about how great it is to meet professionally and then become personal friends.
We cover the importance of friends who help us maintain our boundaries and how our friend groups change throughout our lives. We also touch on how realizing we have the wrong friends helps us keep on our toes, looking for people who are a fit with us.
Amy shares her experience from 20+ years ago, when, as a new mother, she returned to her work in a "big law firm" a mere 4 weeks after giving birth. She was exhausted and had zero energy for making friends. One of her work friends at the firm stepped up and helped her figure out how to handle that high stress job and a new baby. Amy notes that her friend, who has become one of her ride-or-dies, is not a parent.
Which, of course, led to talking about the advantage of having friends with different life experiences who bring a richness and perspective to our relationships. We both believe this is particularly important for moms with young children because we know how easy it is to find ourselves in the parenting tunnel.
Perhaps my favorite part of our chat happened when Amy shared that some of her most important friends weren't traditional friends. They were the women who hosted the podcasts and wrote the books she listened to as she shopped or watched a sporting event. When she ran out of energy and it was just too much to even consider talking to anyone, she relied on those voices in her earbuds. They became the voices in her head (this will be a podcast topic!).
Amy talks about feeling like a crone most of her life. So, now that she's entering her 50's, she feels like she's coming home. And, as the wisest crones know, as we age, we get to forgive ourselves for beating ourselves up about things like not having enough friends. We realize that we did the best we could at the time and survived to tell the story.
And that right there is why I created this podcast: To share the wisdom of women over 50, and to reassure our younger listeners that life is not about the mistakes we've made, it's about weaving them into our stories as powerful examples of how we've grown.
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Have someone you want me to interview (including you) or a topic you'd like us to cover? Email me at shesnotdoneyetyall@gmail.com.
Resources and Show Links:
Atlanta Wills & Trust Law Group: https://atlantawillsandtrusts.com/
Amy's Social:
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/refecas.refecas (personal)
https://www.facebook.com/atlwillsandtrustslawgroup (business)
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amyrefeca/ (personal)
https://www.instagram.com/atlwillsandtrustslawgroup/ (@atlwillsandtrustslawgroup)
X (formerly Twitter): @atlwills_trusts
Email me (Becky): shesnotdoneyetyall@gmail.com
My coaching website: https://beckyberrycoach.com